February 21, 2017

• Looking at Long Lost Friends

  I had a friend in high school who was my best and most valued friend. She was a year younger but we had so much in common. We spent time at each others homes, had sleep overs, shared clothes, traded books and music and laughed so long and hard that we would both be in tears. I went to college, she went to college. In October of her sophomore year, she dropped out of school to marry an older man. She was 19 and he was 35. I attended the wedding. There weren't very many people as it was a very small and seemingly hurried affair. He dressed her in traditional Vietnamese wedding attire as her wedding dress. As soon as they said their "I dos" she was whisked away for a honeymoon - destination unknown. She literally disappeared. About 7 years later I received a letter from her. She was living in St. Louis, MO and working as a paralegal. She and her husband (a career military officer) had joined the L-5 society and were personal friends with Robert Heinlein. It was an odd letter and I did write back but that was the last correspondence I had with her. About 5 years after that while visiting my parents in Muncie, she called my mother to get my new address only to be told that I was sitting a few feet away. Within minutes she was at the door. We had a great visit. She was in town to visit her father. She and her family were on their way to Virginia where her husband was being assigned as the commanding officer of the ROTC program at a big college. I gave her my address and she promised to send me her new address as soon as she had one. Again silence. For years. Then came Facebook. She looked me up and friended me. We played Trivia Crack and Words With Friends. She never posts much on FB (and I never post much either). I know that her 4 children are grown and out of the nest. I have no idea what she looks like as she never ever posts photos of herself.

  Out of the blue her older sister contacts my younger sister and asks for my phone number. There is a little bit of back and forth and I consent to let my sister give out my phone number. Curiosity did kill the cat and I decided that with the cat dead there was no danger to this mouse. OH MY STARS AND GARTERS! This woman (who I knew slightly and was never a friend to) texts me her life story. A story of woe. Her husband of many years died in 2013, her dad died 8 months later in 2014 (he was 99 yrs old). She was looking for a place to live and after talking to a friend of a friend ended up renting from her dead husband's old college roommate! You guessed it they fell in love and were planning to get married as soon as she turned 60 in a couple months. They were waiting so that she could still collect her 1st husband's pension. Seems this last Sunday she went to check on him in his room and he had passed away. So she is now homeless. Then she added that her sister (my friend) was divorcing her husband for some indiscretion that occurred 20 years ago! If my math is right she is 57 and he would be 73 years old. Her sister's comment was that my friend has never grasped the concept of forgiveness. At that my phone ran out of space for her text. I'm not sure why she is contacting me and what she expects me to do or say.

  So xangans what am I supposed to do? Any words of wisdom from xangaland would be appreciated.

  • 6:12 am
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