Several of my friends posted this on the evil FaceBook. It is a series of questions which you are supposed to supply truthful answers. Most of the time these questions have some vague sexual undertones but this one seems benign. I thought I'd play along, only on xanga instead of on FB...

How many tattoos do you have? None and not likely that I'd ever willingly get one!
How many piercings do you have? Two - one in each ear. They've both grown closed.
How many times have you been married? Only once and that is a good thing!
How many times have you divorced? Mercy! Never. I believe in that death do us part stuff.
How many children do you have? I have 2 sons. But they insist they are no longer children...
How many times have you miscarried? Once.
How many surgeries have you had? Six or eight if you count the oral surgeries for wisdom teeth extraction.
Have you ever shot a gun? Hmm. I've only shot targets - once sort of. I've never tried to shoot a gun, fired yes, shot no.
Have you ever quit a job? Yes I have, 4 times. Not the same job but 4 different jobs.
Have you ever flown on a plane? I've flown in a plane. I prefer a seat inside the plane instead of like those daredevils.
Have you ever ridden over 100 miles in a car? Of course. Almost everyone has at one time or another.
Have you ever hit a deer? Thankfully no. Although it is looking like that the only way I'm getting any venison.
Have you ever gone zip lining? No. Zip lining would be my version of hell.
Have you ever cried over someone? Yep. Isn't that part of growing up and living life?
Have you ever fallen in love? Well duh. Of course. Contrary to popular opinion I do have a heart.
Have you ever skipped school? Only once on senior skip day. I felt guilty about it.
Have you ever watched someone give birth? Well, I've seen lots of births - horses, sheep, cows, dog, cats, rats, mice, rabbits... but no people in person. Only those videos they make you watch in Lamaze class.
Have you ever watched someone die? Sadly yes.
Have you ever been to Canada? Is there some sort of Freudian thing asking this question right after asking about witnessing death? But to answer the question - Yes twice! Once as a kid and once after I was married.
Have you ridden in an ambulance? I am lucky to be able to say no.
Have you been to Hawaii? Not yet. It is on the list.
Have you been to Europe? Nope. I still need to get my passport.
Have you been to Washington D.C? Oh yes! I loved DC. The history, the monuments, the architecture, the art!
Have you visited Florida? Yes at least 4 times. But it is on the agenda for sometime this winter...
Have you visited Mexico? Yep. Once and I was not impressed. Maybe if I hadn't been in a little touristy border town it would have been better.
Have you visited Las Vegas? Ha! Yes. Sin City is quite the place. You know what happens to all those show girls with breast augmentation when they age out of their jobs? They become hotel clerks and ticket takers.
Have you sung karaoke? Sort of. At a church retreat. There were only a dozen of us. It was fun but I'd never do it at a bar!
Have you had a pet? Many over the years. Cats, dogs, gerbils, rats, mice, and an alligator.
Have you been sledding on big hill? Slater Hill at Purdue - on a cafeteria tray. Talk about fast and bumpy!
Have you been downhill skiing? No. I did cross country skiing and ended up going down a hill but it wasn't the same.
Have you ridden on a motorcycle? Only once. Did a circle around the front yard at a friend's house hanging on to her dad for dear life. Never again.
Have you ridden a horse? Yep. Several times and I can honestly say it is not my thing.
Have you stayed in a hospital? Yes. Longer than I wanted.
Have you donated blood? I tried several times but I was either too thin, too anemic, or too recently sick.
Have you driven a stick shift? I learned to drive one and until this last car all were manual transmissions.
Have you had a ride in the back of a police car? Nope. As a Girl Scout we got to sit in the back of one for about 60 seconds.

So now you know all the juicy details about my life of debauchery and crime.

During my last ceramics class there were a large number of younger women and 1 woman in particular that I noticed. She had a very pretty face and a lovely smile. She also seemed to be constantly on the defensive. Her shelf was just above mine so I made an effort to be neighborly. I loaned her some tools and offered some advice when the instructor was busy elsewhere. Eventually she opened up and we had several conversations. She had large gauges in her ears. These were grotesquely large as in I'm pretty sure I could have put a hand through them. Several weeks into the class she shaved half her head. Her arms were covered in tattoos - a sort of "day of the dead" mural. Although we were working with clay, she wore very baggy and sloppy clothes. I kept wondering why she would purposely try to make herself as unattractive as possible.

I've noticed this condition before. Its been going on for a long time, as in generations upon generations of women. It seems to be a defensive strategy to prove that they are undesirable and not worthy of love. Other women have gained weight as a sort of insulation against male attention. As I spoke with her, she revealed her past history of abandonment by her father, abuse at the hands of her stepfather, her failed toxic relationships with men. She was adamant that she would never again have her heart broken. And perhaps subconsciously she was making sure that she would not be attractive. She was showing the world that she was not worthy of her father's protection. She was making sure that the abuse was not hidden - indeed the message of "damaged goods" was literally worn on her sleeve. All that because she felt unlovable.

Another woman I know seems to have everything - a great job, smart beautiful children, a loving husband. To top it off she is pretty with a metabolism that allows her to eat anything she wants. She embodies what most women would consider the "perfect life". Yet she feels that she is not deserving of all those good things. She tells me that she is a failure and that she doesn't deserve her life. She battles depression. When her depression has the upper hand, she becomes negative, says hurtful ugly things, and tries to prove that no one loves her by pushing them away. All because she thinks she is unlovable.

When will women (and men too) discover that they are beautiful? Beautiful not based on a shifting cultural standard, but on the reflection of the Divine in their hearts, minds, and souls? When will they realize that they were made worthy of love as soon as the Divine Spark touched them?

I have most but not all my Christmas shopping completed. I still need to get a couple things for Sparky. I wanted to find a dancing dashboard Minion for his car but there aren't any to be found at a reasonable price. When they first came out, you could pick one up for $2.99. Searching the internet I was able to find them in sets of 4 for $50 (shipping and handling extra). So I'm scratching it off the list. I was thinking about getting the gift for the work gift exchange but the rules this year have changed. Management is purchasing the gifts and we will have the "dirty Santa" exchange where you can steal a gift and the person who gets it on the 3rd steal gets to keep it. In the past the "hot" gifts were all alcohol but this year there won't be any gifts that involve alcohol or gambling. There won't be the flurry of thievery over the stack of lottery tickets or the bottle of Vodka. We were at Goodwill looking for our traditional "lame" t-shirts that we buy the boys.
We passed up this one:

It was too cute - really. Neither son would be caught dead in a My Pretty Pony t-shirt even if it was Dr. Who themed. Too bad it wasn't my size.
We ended up getting a Transformers t-shirt

We had several other choices including a Deathnote t-shirt that was very interesting but Sparky hates clothes that have skeletons/skulls on them. There was a very neat (and brand new) t-shirt for Notre Dame but Sparky thought it was too small. He finally picked the tie-dye Beatles t-shirt.

Other than purchasing the "elf gift" (underwear because elves are completely over the whole toy thing), all I have to do now is the wrapping. Will I start early and do elaborate wrapping jobs with patterned tissue paper and fancy bows? Or will I just chuck everything in gift bags and call it good??

Gettin' to know you, gettin' to know all about you. Reminds me of a song... Seriously the way we build relationships of any kind is to share information about ourselves. It is a variation on the call and response of the universe. The more we know about someone, the better we are able to make connections between their experiences and our own. On the surface it can give us a starting point for conversation and as we look deeper we can develop empathy, sympathy, and feelings of camaraderie. So in the interest of better friendship I present my revealing answers to these probing questions.

1. Are you named after someone? Not intentionally, well sort of, kind of. I was due to be born on St. Valentine's Day. I came a bit early.
2. When is the last time you cried? Halloween.
3. Do you like your handwriting? I'm quite fond of my penmanship. I worked very hard and put in countless hours of practice.
4. What is your favorite lunch meat? Maple cured smoked ham. I only get it on very special occasions because it is too expensive!
5. Do you have kids? I've never owned any goats.
6. If you were another person, would you be friends with you? Absolutely! I'm sure we'd be so close we'd finish each others sentences.
7. Do you use sarcasm? Sarcasm is like horseradish - a little goes a long way. It is an acquired taste as well.
8. Do you still have your tonsils? No. I lost those at the age of 27. It was not an elective procedure. It was not fun.
9. Would you bungee jump? My credo is "Never pay to be tortured". Bungee jumping falls into that category.
10. What is your favorite kind of cereal? I don't eat cereal anymore. They used to make a grape-nuts with raisins, pecans and cherries in it. It was delicious. When they stopped making it I stopped eating cereal. No other kinds could compare.
11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? Not usually. Probably because most of my shoes are slip-ons.
12. Do you think you're strong? I may be small physically but mentally and intellectually I'm a giant. Giants are pretty strong.
13. What is your favorite ice cream? Rum Raisin. Hard to find but soooo worth it! Kilwin's has it...
14. What is the first thing you notice about people? For some odd reason the first thing I notice is teeth and smiles.
15. Red or pink? Red or pink what?? If we are talking nail polish or roses or even sweaters there isn't much difference in my opinion. Now if we are talking about the level of doneness of a piece of meat - I prefer pink over red.
16. What is the least favorite physical thing you like about yourself? I'm confused - is this something I like about myself or something I don't like about myself? I'm going to go with my short stubby toes and that ugly lipoma on my biceps.
17. What color pants and shoes are you wearing now? It is snowing. I'm wearing black jeans and my black and grey leopard print slippers.
18. What was the last thing you ate? 600 mg of Ibuprofen and a bottle of Propel.
19. What are you listening to right now? the sound of my phone announcing that a bazillion people are responding to my mother's FB post that I commented on.
20. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? If I were a crayon I'd be that white one that no one ever uses. When the box is destroyed and all the other crayons are either peeled or broken, it is still looking like new.
21. Favorite smell? Cinnamon rolls baking in the oven.
22. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? Sparky. He was telling me to eat lunch without him...
23. Favorite sport to watch? Ice skating. I subscribe to a xanga blog called kwantifiable that just posts ice skating news and video clips of performances. So fun to watch!!
24. Hair color? Red in transition. The last hairdresser told me I've got about 30% gray (well sort of gray, kind of more blond and white) and of course I'm working on some very impressive "bride of Frankenstein" streaks at my temples.
25. Eye color? Hazel - they switch between green, brown and a weird red that matches my hair with gold flecks that come and go.
26. Do you wear contacts? Not ever. I can't handle the thought of putting something on my eyeballs!
27. Favorite food to eat? Fried squid followed closely by sushi (but I'm picky about the types). And I love potatoes in most forms.
28. Scary movies or happy endings? Never scary movies. I have a very very active imagination and even the trailers for those scary movies cause me to want to sleep with the lights on!!
29. Last movie you watched? Kubo and the Two Strings. It was an awesome movie!!
30. What color shirt are you wearing? Grey and black fleece lined sweatshirt.
31. Summer or Winter? Neither. I prefer the middle instead of the two seasonal extremes.
32. Hugs or kisses? I'm not a real touchy-feely person. I'd give/accept hugs from close friends and family and I'll kiss my mother and my husband. But I'm not going to man a kissing booth or stand on a street corner advertising free hugs.
33. What book are you currently reading? Working my way through the Gospel according to John.
34. Who do you miss right now? My dad.
35. What is on your mouse pad? A mouse and some Cheetos dust.
36. What is the last TV program you watched? Sherlock.
37. What is the best sounding noise? The sound of a cat purring in your ear.
38. Rolling Stones or The Beatles? I like the Beatles but the Stones are good too - as long as I don't have to see them! They have not aged gracefully. Mick and Keith were never good looking even before the ravages of time and substance abuse!
39. What is the furthest you have ever traveled? According to geocaching.com where we track our travels my farthest is
GC30CV0 - Resistance is futile! (Washington, United States) at 1903.39 miles from home.
40. Do you have a special talent? I can predict precipitation. It is my super power along with a talent for picking out perfectly ripe melons.
41. Where were you born? Flint Michigan - back when the water was OK.
42. People you expect to participate? If you don't put expectations on people you are never disappointed.

Last week we attended an Indian concert featuring Carnatic Classical music. As I understand it, the carnatic style is predominantly from the southern part of India. There was a larger than normal audience partly I think because it is nearing the end of the semester. Some music students are required to attend a set number of musical performances and time is running out! Besides the concert admission was free.

I'm nearly illiterate when it comes to Indian music so I can't tell you what songs they played. I do know that the first piece was a raaga. I had not heard any of the instruments played before (at least not in the styles presented).

The flute was bamboo and was called a venu or bansuri depending if you read the program or listened to the announcer or the musician. I was amazed at the variety of sounds produced by the flute. During the introduction we were told that the flute didn't produce sharp or flat notes but those tones were achieved using a special fingering technique. The artist was J. A. Jayanth.He explained briefly the music signature sort of. All I could understand was there were 8 beats and maybe 32 cycles or repetitions or something. I decided to just let the music happen and not try too hard to figure out the intricacies.

The violinist had a style unlike any I'd seen before. He used some sort of oil or rosin or something on his fingers that facilitated his sliding his fingers up and down the strings. I kept thinking his fingers had to have callouses or he would have deep cuts on his finger tips! This musician was B. U. Ganesh Prasad and he seemed very unflappable. There was an issue with the sound system and he just nodded and kept playing. Very chill.

The drum player was T. K. Murugaboopathi. He seemed the "old man" of the ensemble. I had never seen a mridangam before. It is a double headed drum where each end is a different diameter. It had a mesmerizing quality. His fingers flew and his hands were in near constant motion. I thought it was almost better than the tabla!

Then there was the ghatam. It is a percussion instrument made of a clay pot with a narrow mouth. The inner surface has copper, brass or iron filings. The size varies and that determines the pitch. It is drummed with the fingers, thumbs, palms and heel of the hands to produce different sounds. The musician, Dr. S. "Ghatam" Karthick was very entertaining to watch. At first I couldn't pick out the sound of his instrument but after a few minutes I could distinctly hear it.

The best part of the evening was watching the musicians have fun playing together. They would count for each other and the smiling and communication between them was a joy to watch. There are probably musicians that are better or more skilled but when a group plays together and really and truly enjoys making the music it imbues the creation with a spark that is irresistible!

As you read this I am in the middle of Thanksgiving Day food preparations. I will have the turkey washed and patted dry. The bird will then be artfully arranged breast down in the baking pan and a bottle of white wine emptied into the bird's body cavity. The vegetables need to be cut and seasoned before being spread on a baking sheet ready for the oven. The green bean casserole will be mixed by son#1. He will have it ready and waiting for its scheduled entrance into the oven. The pies are ready, the cranberry sauce is prepared and the beverages are chilling.

I will be surrounded by people I love. We will feast and laugh and count our blessings. Today I will let go of all the troubles that have been pressing in on me this last month. Today I'm focused on the good things in my life. Things like:

• My loving and faithful husband
• My wonderful sons who are good people, handsome, smart, hard working and funny
• Good health
• Wonderful friends who lift me up and calm me down
• My normal and kind and plain nice family - even thought they are far away it seems they are close
• A roof over my head
• A career I enjoy
• Church family that cares for and supports me
• A car that is reliable, economical, and cute to boot!
• Hobbies that make life fun
• Xanga friends - some here and some now absent
• Faith
• Memory
• Whimsy
• Fun hats
• Chocolate
• Leftovers - I'm counting on it!

My friend Crystalline wanted to know if I'd post my Pumpkin Eggnog Pie recipe. This pie combines two of my favorite flavors - eggnog and pumpkin. It has to be one of the most decadent pies I've made. Now I've had other pies that have been chock full of more calories. I've had pies so cloyingly sweet that you were begging for a beverage to cut the sugar clogging your throat. I've tasted pies that made your pancreas go into spasms. This pie has that rich smooth texture that is unique to custard. Although it is sweet it isn't the same kind of sweetness as a Snickers Pie or the Death By Chocolate Pie. Heck, it isn't even as sweet at Pecan Pie... But it is every bit as delightful. This one is not for those with a problem with dairy. If you are watching your cholesterol, just say no. However if you are willing to take a small piece and have a touch of self control, you will not regret eating this pie.

Pumpkin Eggnog Pie

1 pie crust - you can go homemade from scratch or a pre-made one in its own aluminum pie pan or anything in between. It doesn't really matter as long as you DO NOT prick the crust prior to baking. So put the pie crust in a pie plate and bake at 425°F for 7 minutes until slightly golden. Remove from the oven. Reduce the oven temperature to 350°F.

4 eggs
1/2 cup sugar
2 1/2 cups Pumpkin Eggnog (Kroger, Borden, Dean's, and others carry it during the holidays)
Mix the above ingredients together until well blended. Pour into the pie crust. I always place my pie plate on a cookie sheet or pizza pan just in case it overflows. Place in the oven and bake for 15-20 minutes Place a pie ring over the crust to prevent over browning. Aluminum foil works too. Bake for another 15-20 minutes until the center is almost set - the center should be a little giggly. Remove from the oven and allow it to cool for 2 hours before serving or storing in the refrigerator.

I was going to post a photo but I wanted to get this up so that if anyone wanted to make this pie for Thanksgiving they'd have time to make it.

One of the things I've liked about the new xanga was the lack of spam. Well, I guess my spamless days are over. In the last week I've gotten several comments. They were the kind of mumbo jumbo things that made me think the person commenting had not read my posts. But what really and truly disturbed me was their screen names: "donald Trump and Kkk endorsement", "popefrancis- donald trump- antichrist", "Donald Trump Agenda For Presidency", "donald trump Antichrist" and "donald trump announcement today". There are more but you get the idea. I have 54 spam comments in my spam folder and most have been added in the last week and not a one of them has a xanga page. Anyway I guess what I'm saying is that even the spammers have gone political! To combat that I'm going to post some random stuff just for the heck of it!

1. My coworker Elmer Fudd managed to get 2 deer. Because they were smaller ones I don't get one for myself. He however, is going to gift me with a bit of venison! Guess what we'll be having for Christmas dinner!

2. We are officially undergoing an "Organizational Analysis and Design Process" also known as the OAD Process (pronounced O - add) for our department. Several people are nervous. Yes, I'm one of them.

3. The movie Fantastical Beasts premiered on Friday. I really wanted to see it but there was no way I was going to the late late showing. So it is on the schedule for this week. Maybe tonight.

4. I've got my menu for Thanksgiving set: Turkey. We are traditionalists. You won't find chicken or ham on the table. As for the rest of the dishes it looks like we'll be having real mashed potatoes, homemade turkey gravy, green bean casserole, roasted carrots, sweet potatoes and Brussels sprouts, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie (traditional), pumpkin eggnog pie, black and green olives. Possibly some other additions depending on what the boys provide... Probably beer.

5. Sparky has been binge watching the BBC series Sherlock. I've started joining him. It is growing on me. I'm not a big fan of the actor who plays Sherlock Holmes (Benedict Cumberbatch) but I do like the actor who plays Dr. Watson (Martin Freeman).

Last week for all its turmoil was filled with several fun events. Son#2 plays with the IUSB Philharmonic. He usually is very secretive about the public performances. In fact we usually don't find out about them until the day before, if we are lucky. He told us the date last month, nearly 6 weeks in advance. That was unusual in itself but he really sent my "mom senses" into overdrive when he casually asked if we would attend. I told him I would put it on the calendar. Fast forward to the beginning of this month when he had us over for dinner (and to pay the rent). He reminds us that his concert performance is coming up. At this point I am fairly certain that something unusual is going on. I tell him that we wouldn't miss it for the world.

The concert time arrives and we take our seats. Opening the program we peruse the list of music being presented before turning the page. It is all some of my favorite composers (although Bayolo is new to me, I had to wonder about the names of the sections in his composition - it could be entertaining).

Turning the page I read down the list of instrumentalists to find son#2's name. They are arranged by instrument and are listed in order by the "chair" they hold. To my delight, son#2 is first violist! So the mystery is solved! My suspicions were confirmed. He isn't one to crow about his achievements so his not so subtle hints that we really needed to attend this concert were his way of telling us the good news.

In addition to that we were able to see him playing (he was in the first row). I am especially proud of the way the viola section interacted before the performance and afterwards. Where the violins were like an armed camp, the violas were a team. Son#2 made sure the newer musicians had their music in order and that everyone's chairs were arranged so that they could see the conductor. There was one violin (2nd chair) who was trying very hard to watch the conductor but her stand partner (3rd chair) kept moving the stand so that she had to look and sit at an odd angle to see the music. Sad. The violas all congratulated each other on good performances and chatted about plans as they were gathering their music before leaving the stage. The violins were stony faced and looked unhappy. When I asked about it, son#2 shrugged and said that's just how they are. No wonder they have to import violinists from the SBSO to fill out the violin section!

Anyway I was very pleased that son#2 did so well and even had fun playing, especially the Dvorak. I saw him smile as he was playing the last piece...

Sometimes our newspaper prints things that make my blood boil - headlines that are cryptic or grammatically incorrect. Then there are the times that I read something (other than the comic page) that just sends me into fits of laughter. I'm not sure if this is a case of parental passive aggressiveness or if the tongue-in-cheek announcement was a peek into the playfulness the young couple embrace. Either way I got a good chuckle out of it and it made going into work a little more bearable!

Anyway, I thought it might entertain you as well!